I Dreamt My Cat Was Human

A strange vision had haunted my nightmares last night,

Of my cat turning human by the midnight’s moonlight.

I recoiled in great horror at the sight that I saw,

There was no more cat left, from its ears to its paws.

“Who are you, sir?” I asked, “And for my cat must I grieve?”

But he replied, “No it’s me, but you can just call me Steve.”

“Oh great.” I reacted “He can help me pay rent!”

Yet, on his rear end, would go the time that he’d spent.

After returning home late from a hard day at work,

Received a “where is my dinner?” from this self-centered jerk.

Then, after drinking my sorrows, I returned one-night drunk,

To catch him nude on the couch with his tongue on his junk.

When Steve did his business, it ended up on the floor,

He’d wait for me to clean it, then just poop some more.

In the basement, I wandered, to see where had my dog been,

And in the dryer he tumbled, hot and sick, but quite clean.

In the morning I awoke to a purr and some sass,

As a feline he’s adorable, but as a human, an ass.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s