“Now that you’re an adult, you might still feel a pang of guilt when you decline a dinner invitation in favor of a good book. Or maybe you like to eat alone in restaurants and could do without the pitying looks from fellow diners. Or you’re told that you’re “in your head too much”, a phrase that’s often deployed against the quiet and cerebral.
Or maybe there’s another word for such people: thinkers.”
Since the first introvert survival guide was a fair success, I thought that I would try my hand at another. After all, there’s no limit to the introverted troubles that we may find ourselves in. There are constantly people and obligations which push their ways into our introverted bubbles and so we need to be prepared to counter these troubles with real solutions!
So, let’s begin!
Introvert Problems And Solutions
Problem #1: In between reading books and binge watching series all to yourself, you’ve been getting kind of lonely lately. Life’s so damn great when you have your own space to be able to expand that large cranium of yours with useful information and awesome creative stuff, except it’s not much fun having all of that without anyone to share it with. So what’s a lonely introvert to do?
Solution #1: Well, first of all – let’s consider our options. Bars are out of the question, since no one needs another drunk for a friend, and you shouldn’t need to get hammered to make friends either. So that’s out. We could go to the library and talk about books with other introverts like us but two shy people trying to talk can be quite comical in it’s execution. Make plenty of friends online, join a book club, push yourself out of your comfort zone and try new things. There are tons of apps out there to mingle with others from the comfort of your own bubble now!
Problem #2: You’re hungry with the desire for a million pizzas, although you’ve decided that you will settle for just one. You painstakingly craft your Italian masterpiece through the web app of your favorite pizza place, but when you go to process your order you receive an error! The web app isn’t working. 😦 Oh, no. Your hands begin to shake. Are you going to make the dreaded phone call?
Solution #2: Well, spend an additional 20-30 minutes trying to get the web app to work. “Maybe next time, maybe next time”, you tell yourself as you begin to get hungrier and hungrier. The phone call could be so awkward and you might stumble on your order, and what if they try to up-sell you? Yuck, unbearable! The app’s still not working. Forget it, let’s cook pasta.
Problem #3: You’re taking a road trip to a location in another city that you’re not familiar with. You’ve lost yourself along the way, your cell phone is all out of data, and there’s no GPS in your vehicle. Oh god, you might have to ask for directions. The torture…
Solution #3: Well, we could ask someone random on the street for directions but ugh… What if we’re disturbing their walk. What if they hate us for it. Am I being neurotic? Let’s just go buy a coffee or something cheap and ask that person! Then they must help us with our questions!
Problem #4: You’ve met a girl or boy that you’ve absolutely fallen head over heels for. You’ve exchanged a few words and you have a good feeling about the possibilities but you’re not quite sure what to do. It would be far too embarrassing if you guessed wrong their intentions and were rejected, so you sit back and contemplate your options. What’s a quiet introvert to do?
Solution #4: Simple! It’s time to begin the introvert mating ritual where you find them online and creep every single one of their social media accounts. Lead a little trail of breadcrumbs back to you with likes and hearts or whatever nonsense is on your social media. Now, is the time for you to foster that inorganic, organic relationship! The more likes, the more they’ll know you’re hot under the collar for them. It’s only a matter of time now until they fall into your trap. 😉
There you have it my introvert friends. Real-life struggles call for real-life solutions. As always, I’m there to catch you when you fall. From one introvert to another;
“May your roads traveled be free of people and your cell phone’s always fully charged!“ -Mathew, Blog of the Wolf Boy
P.s. This is somewhat terrible life advice from the mind of a neurotic introvert and it’s not to be taken completely seriously! It’s intended to be slightly comical, use any of the advice in this post with extreme caution. 😀
Opinions? Comments? Let me know down below and thanks for reading. 🙂